How to complete a relationship?
When feelings arise in relation to another person: love or hate, resentment or guilt, then in the body they are expressed in the form of arousal - energy intended to move from feeling to action. Feelings predetermine the goal we want to achieve. The situation of incompleteness arises at a time when we can not perform the actual actions for us. This happens only for two reasons: when the other person leaves the field of our contact opportunities, or when we ourselves block the expression of feelings and the end of the situation.
Since complete satisfaction can only be achieved with the help of a relevant action, the unexpressed expression is restrained artificially with the help of a muscular corset. After that, the external situation becomes an internal looped program. Two contradictory forces are created inside the body - aimed at completion and assimilation and restraining. The mutual action of these forces becomes habitual and is activated in actual or extreme situations.The main result of this reaction is the high energy consumption and the inability to create new relations due to the old obsession.
This process can be applicable not only to relationships, but also to personal qualities, habitual behavior that you want to change. For example, if you feel insecure in your abilities or fear in a particular, conscious situation, you can say goodbye to them through this process. In order for it to work, you must have an inner desire to let this person go or this situation. Say goodbye. And that means - complete the relationship or your involvement.
Choose a time when no one will disturb you and you will be comfortable, sit at the table, take a pen and a piece of paper. Write a farewell letter to the person you are interested in. In the letter note:
- How did you feel about him when you were in a relationship?
- What did you feel and what would you like to say about the moment of your separation?
- What would you like to change in your relationship if you could bring it all back?
- What would you like to say to him, but you could not (express all that was not expressed - disappointment, anger, pain, other feelings)?
- What are you offended by him?
- What are you feeling guilty about?
- What you can not forgive?
- What do you forgive?
Write a conclusion in which you express all that you want to say at the end of the letter, say goodbye, thank and release. Burn the letter.
In the process of writing, keep track of what is happening in your body - any sensations (throat, pain, cramps, etc.) at the moment when the feeling arises. Even if it scares you, try to feel it, strengthen it and give it a way out.
Do not limit yourself - cry, shout, express what you want, with gestures or facial expressions, do whatever your body wants
Instead, I want to say that the structure of the farewell letter provides an excellent opportunity to rehearse a real farewell to the person with whom you want to end the relationship. If you have the opportunity, you can repeat this process with a real person so that your relationship becomes complete for both of you.
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